I will have many posts I am sure on hipsters - as they are the bane of my existence. My first rant will be their bicycle riding. I am not opposed to the riding of bikes - hey! it is the national transportation of China. But unlike the Chinese who are creative and innovative, hipsters lack common sense and tend to smell. Instead of wearing appropriate gear to ride their bikes like bicycle shorts, mesh shirts or sneakers, they tend to wear fitted jeans, converse and button down plaid shirts. And they proceed to think that they can then continue to go to work wearing such clothes after having biked from South Williamsburg (which doesn't even exist - its called Buschwick assholes!) to the Upper East Side. Now, I speak of this from personal experience, YOU STINK! PLEASE! that is why you bring a change of clothes and clean yourself up in the bathroom (use some deodorant) and then proceed to work. Lets be honest, the train is only $2, you could always take your bike to work on the train and then ride home so that you are smelly for your roommate and not your co-workers. Do you think you are ever going to get a good job smelling like that? I know you are still hold out for that record deal or that your zine will take off - but lets be honest, you suck! Your life sucks! And your bike makes you look stupid. Yeah, I said it, STUPID! Join a Gym you cheap fuck! Oh, and by the way, yeah you may be thin but you are poor and dirty.Friday, November 21, 2008
Hipsters . . . bikes
I will have many posts I am sure on hipsters - as they are the bane of my existence. My first rant will be their bicycle riding. I am not opposed to the riding of bikes - hey! it is the national transportation of China. But unlike the Chinese who are creative and innovative, hipsters lack common sense and tend to smell. Instead of wearing appropriate gear to ride their bikes like bicycle shorts, mesh shirts or sneakers, they tend to wear fitted jeans, converse and button down plaid shirts. And they proceed to think that they can then continue to go to work wearing such clothes after having biked from South Williamsburg (which doesn't even exist - its called Buschwick assholes!) to the Upper East Side. Now, I speak of this from personal experience, YOU STINK! PLEASE! that is why you bring a change of clothes and clean yourself up in the bathroom (use some deodorant) and then proceed to work. Lets be honest, the train is only $2, you could always take your bike to work on the train and then ride home so that you are smelly for your roommate and not your co-workers. Do you think you are ever going to get a good job smelling like that? I know you are still hold out for that record deal or that your zine will take off - but lets be honest, you suck! Your life sucks! And your bike makes you look stupid. Yeah, I said it, STUPID! Join a Gym you cheap fuck! Oh, and by the way, yeah you may be thin but you are poor and dirty.
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Oh I know this is an olde post, but it cracked my depressed-unemployed ass up! Yes-hipsters smell, or at least consciously attempt to look smelly and have no concept of the common courtesy called personal hygiene. There was this hipster at the office I internet at last summer, and he too biked in to work from "Billyburg" (I just vomited in my mouth). It seems that there's a certain kind of "I'm hip and I smell and don't shave, look at my mountainman beard and hairy armpits-"chic with these people. Enough already.
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